To show what you have learned about revising and editing, you will revise and edit the second body paragraph of your response to the module writing prompt. if you need inspiration, check out the original and revised body paragraph in the lesson.
in the space below, paste your second body paragraph as it was written in your first complete draft.
revision focus: idea development and transitions
carry out the following revisions to improve your second body paragraph.
introduction of quotation: improve the introduction of at least two of your quotations. highlight the revision.
evidence: add or change (make it shorter, make it longer, or change it entirely) two examples in the paragraph. if you add an example, be sure it is explained. highlight the revision.
explanation: strengthen the explanation of two of your examples by connecting the evidence and the controlling idea. highlight the revision.
connections: add an explanation that connects the two texts. highlight the revision.
transitions: include a minimum of three transitional words or phrases to connect ideas. highlight the transitions in your topic sentence and within your body paragraph.
edit: read your new and improved second body paragraph. ensure the spelling, punctuation, and usage are correct.
include your revised and edited paragraph below:

What caused the american civil war? there were many reasons for a civil war to happen in america, and political issues and disagreements began soon after the american revolution ended in 1782. between the years 1800 and 1860, arguments between the north and south grew more intense. one of the main quarrels was about taxes paid on goods brought into this country from foreign countries. this tax was called a tariff. southerners felt these tariffs were unfair and aimed toward them because they imported a wider variety of goods than most northern people. taxes were also placed on many southern goods that were shipped to foreign countries, an expense that was not always applied to northern goods of equal value. an awkward economic structure allowed states and private transportation companies to do this, which also affected southern banks that found themselves paying higher interest rates on loans made with banks in the north. the situation grew worse after several “panics,” including one in 1857 that affected more northern banks than southern. southern financiers found themselves burdened with high payments just to save northern banks that had suffered financial losses through poor investment. which sentence from the selection states a major detail that supports the main idea? a there were many reasons for a civil war to happen in america, and political issues and disagreements began soon after the american revolution ended in 1782. b taxes were also placed on many southern goods that were shipped to foreign countries, an expense that was not always applied to northern goods of equal value. c the situation grew worse after several "panics," including one in 1857 that affected more northern banks than southern. d this tax was called a tariff. e between the years 1800 and 1860, arguments between the north and south grew more intense.

Read the sentence below about the chicago fire of 1871. schaffer told someone else to strike the wrong alarm box and that caused a miscommunication during the chicago fire of 1871. which revision is the best example of adding concrete details? schaffer told another person in his office to sound the wrong alarm and that caused a big miscommunication during the chicago fire. schaffer told his assistant to strike the wrong alarm box and that caused a miscommunication during the massive chicago fire of 1871. schaffer mistakenly told his assistant to strike alarm box 342 instead of the correct box and that caused a miscommunication during a fire in chicago. schaffer mistakenly told his assistant to strike alarm box 342, and as a result, firefighters were directed to an incorrect location during the chicago fire of 1871.

Based on what you have read, write two or three sentences explaining what the point of view in the memoir allows readers to learn about helen keller.