BRAINLIEST+10 POINTS+5 STARS!! Here is a portion of my book (not the beginning) I would appreciate it if you could leave some feedback and tips! Thank you for this HUGE favor!

here ya go...

“Bull’s Eye!” I say as I throw another apple at my target, with my airmaster powers.

“Oh, I can do better than that.” says Fallon, my 11-year old sister. I have 4 sisters and 5 brothers. There are 10 of us . I know. Crazy. There is Bill and Newt, who are earthmasters, Thomas and Camille who are watermasters. Me and Fallon are airmasters, and then there is Joseph, Levi, Lysandra, Cassandra and Sophia. Fallon and I are close in age and a middle child so, we are best friends. Our family has a gene that causes us to get our element a year early, so I got mine last year. However, you can't go to FIfeoraz Academy of Masters until you're 12. FAllon is an airmaster, just like me. I have to leave next week so we are doing a bunch of our favorite games including throw the apple at the target.

“Theodorus Vincent Jones! Fallon Louise Jones! What on earth are you doing?”yells Mum.

“Oh no full name.” whispers Fallon. I gulp.

“Mum? We are playing Apple Targets.” I respond.

“With my apples? I’m making pie tonight with those Theodorus!”

“Oh, sorry Mum.” says Fallon. “Would you like us to pick you some more?”

“Yes, and make sure they are the good ones. Let me fix you a snack before you go. It’s a long walk to the orchard.”

how did ya like it? be honest. Its Fiction/Fantasy. Thanks!!