Could someone offer an honest opinion of the beginning of this sci-fi short story i'm writing? she squeezed the small hand. “calm down.” she hissed, the wooden planks trembling below her feet. the boy paused, then continued to jump. “do you want to go back down? ” she asked, a hint of warning in her voice. “nooo! ” he exclaimed, planting his feet on the floor. “i stopped, see? ” “good.” “i stopped.” “shhh. i think it’s going to start.” “welcome! ” a woman’s voice sounded from behind them. they turned to see a woman dressed in a brilliant, wine-red trench coat with well-polished, intricate gold buttons. a flamboyant black tricorn hat with a wide white plume rested on beautiful black hair which ran in great waves over her shoulders. she gestured towards the ceiling. “shall we begin? ” the boy nodded eagerly, a ridiculously wide smile stretching over his face. the woman answered with a smile and raised her foot. bam.