Help! I need it to sound like a 9th grader in English honors

Read this excerpt from "the all-american slurp." i pulled the strings out of my stalk. z-z-zip, z-z-zip. my brother followed suit. z-z-zip, z-z-zip. to my left, my parents were taking care of their own stalks. z-z-zip, z-z-zip, z-z-zip. suddenly i realized that there was dead silence except for our zipping. looking up, i saw that the eyes of everyone in the room were on our family. mr. and mrs. gleason, their daughter meg, who was my friend, and their neighbors the badels—they were all staring at us as we busily pulled the strings of our celery. what story element does the author develop in this excerpt? a) lot details about the party b) characterization of the lins c) characterization of the gleasons d) setting details about the gleasons’ house