There have been many studies about the effect of too much television on children and whether it is harmful or beneficial.

the best way to improve this thesis is to

include the topic being discussed.

clearly take a position or side.

vaguely express a viewpoint.

cite the source of the study.

The best way to improve this thesis is to clearly take a position or side.

Explanation:

To start a paper we have to present a thesis sentence. Thesis sentences contain to parts, the first one presents the topic the author is writing about, that part is "There have been many studies about the effect of too much television on children and whether it is harmful or beneficial.", the second part introduces a personal comment with the position towards the topic on the writers side.

do you know the story wonder?

well on wonder it has different stories from each person and they can all share their thoughts and feeling each not just one. if there was one you would only get to see one persons thoughts and feelings. so do a story point on multiple of the main characters.

hope i !

- lilblakeyout