Which revision improves the professional tone of the text?
Read the excerpt from a report.
(1) Stopping trash before it gets to the ocean is way
better than having to clean it up in the ocean. (2) The
city of Baltimore has a large machine called Mr. Trash
Wheel. (3) The machine is powered by the sun and the
flow of the river. (4) Floating booms off the front of the
machine funnel garbage toward a conveyor belt. (5)
The belt takes the garbage from the water and puts it in
a dumpster. (6) The trash wheel helps collect garbage
in the river after it flows out into the ocean.
Change sentence 1 to: "Preventing garbage from
entering the ocean is more effective than removing
waste from the sea."
Change sentence 2 to: "The city of Baltimore has
really cool machine called Mr. Trash Wheel."
Change sentence 4 to: "Floating booms and a
conveyor belt help the machine work its magic."
Change sentence 5 to: "The belt takes a bunch of
the garbage from the water and then tosses it in a
dumpster."