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Health, 09.06.2021 05:00 ziyonsolange

I am a 13 year old girl in 7th grade. Background info about me and my family: My mom is kind of strict (like all moms are) and my dad is more of the "fun parent". I love cooking for my parents and i enjoy it very very much and im am or was a A+/4.0 student. I sometimes have suicidal thoughts and cut myself (not the point). Anyway. I am really scared and I need help. why? good question. Here is my problem: Since I started middle school, I would get a 4.0 in every semester, and my parents would be super proud of me (like SUPER). After like, maybe 7 semesters they got used it and expected me to get all A's. To be honest it wasn't hard for me at the time since I had real life school. Now present time: I have online school this year (due to the pandemic). I have issues with my internet, and i'm missing online classes a lot (my parents know that). I am also struggling to get work in, and I have lots of missing assignments. Which leads me too.. bad grades. The word keeps stabbing my head. Bad. Grades. i've never seen a grade on my report card lower then a A- except this year. And imagining my parents faces is traumatizing. They expected more then me. and i failed. i'm a failure. i deserve nothing. It's the last week of school for me. you might think i'm acting dramatic but i'm not, im serious. this is my grades right now: Science: B (84.7%) PE: A Pre-Algebra: D- (60.6%) ELA: A- (90.5%) Word History: C (73.5%) Orchestra: F/E They always talk about how good i am and how smart i am and thinking about my grades just sheds tears, bloody tears. please help I need advice.

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