If you burn a piece of wood you will feel heat see water vapor and be left with ashes how come the matter was not destroyed

You cant destroy matter only transform it. 

a fair amount of matter is destroyed. if you weigh a piece of wood before you burn it and the ashes after, you see the difference in weight leftover. you get very little water vapor from a properly dried chunk of wood. wet wood doesnt burn well. 

There would be 36.35 pounds