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What is communication in speech, writing or signals

Susan wants to communicate with julia. arrange the steps of the communication process in the correct order. 1. susan realizes that she would be able to best convey her business plan through an email. 2. julia receives the email. 3. susan drafts an email including all the necessary details of the business plan and sends it across to julia. 4. julia sends an email back to susan summarizing what she understood and stating that she liked susan’s business plan. 5. susan thinks of a business plan that she wants to share with julia. 6. julia reads and understands the business plan that susan wants to share.

Is this inappropriate language,”good evening,everyone. for coming out to sit on hard,uncomfortable stadium concrete on an unseasonably warm evening and wearing clothes and shoes you can’t wait to get home to get get ou of.” if so,how can i write it in formal?